Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Things You Should Know

You should know I’m not stuck up. I have overwhelming social anxiety that makes it difficult for me to be around people and I don’t know how to make small talk. A simple, “Hi, how are you,” can cause me enormous stress if I’m not ready for it.


You should know that my mood swings don’t mean I’m crazy. I just have a lower melting point than most people. It takes very little to overwhelm me. My arthritis makes it worse. Being tired and in pain on top of all the other sensory attacks makes me even more vulnerable.

You should know that it isn’t personal when I turn down your invitations to socialize. It’s not that I don’t like you; I just don’t have the capacity to function in the typical “Hey, let’s catch up over drinks,” situation. Parties are even harder to deal with. Just know that you can always talk to me online. I’m more comfortable in cyberspace than I am in the “real world”.

You should know that simply trying harder won’t change anything. It doesn’t matter how much I want to be cool and friendly and popular, because those things aren’t me. I’m learning to like myself the way I am, quirks and all.

You should know that I care about whatever you may be going through. I don’t always have the words to express it and I may even seem to pull away from you when you’re suffering. Sometimes the empathy I feel for you becomes more than I can handle and I withdraw into myself. When you hurt, I hurt and sometimes it’s too much for me.

You should know that I’m just like you. I want to be loved and I want to be happy. I want to enjoy my life and to be accepted as I am. Most of all, I want to be understood.

2 comments:

  1. Well said! I could see me handing this out to people on a regular basis. :)

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  2. I love this. So true and so well written.

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